After last nights post I went home and I wanted to do some some meditation whilst my partner was out so I chose an Angel one, it was Archangel Raphael and a healing meditation, it took me ages to get into it and I finally started seeing colors and then I started twitching because I was cold so I just got the duvet and rolled my self up with it and had a snooze.
My partner came home, he has been at my friends fixing her door and found me flat out, he woke me up and we went and had tea, I felt exhausted. One thing I have noticed since my PTSD episode last week is that I am sleeping for England at the moment, We had a nice tea and watched my favourite series at the moment, Versaille its called about King Louis the 14th of France, its brilliant I recommend it to anyone who likes history dramas.
We went to bed and I tried to meditate again but I do struggle when I am in bed with my partner, its not his fault he is just going to sleep but he wriggles and makes little noises and I cant let go properly if I have distraction, especially at the moment as I am out of practice so I just lay there listing to the soothing voice and noises, it really does help I took my ear phones out and went to sleep.
This morning I managed a quick 10 mins before work, a positive morning one and then I got my Angel book out, its Doreen Virtues 365 day Angel book I ask the Angels for a message and thank them for there support and I opened the the page up and guess what it said? ” Lighten Up” I did have a little laugh at this. I have been very down recently and very serious and the message was telling me to have fun and be carefree. All very easy for them to say but one thing for sure is no matter how deep into depression I go I will always claw my way back and that is exactly what I am doing now.
Another thing I have started doing this week is affirmations. I am going on holiday in about 7 weeks and I am feeling a bit overweight and I have been saying in the mirror over and over whilst I am getting ready:
” I am healthy and thin and I always win!”
I took it from a Diana Cooper book, I cant remember which one it was but I think she is fabulous she is the first spiritual teacher I got interested in I have most of her books,
And I have two crystals in my bra I have a tigers eye for protection and a blue howlite for healing.
im sure with all this spiritual work I am doing I will lighten up sooner rather than later, I can feel it working already 🙂